I’m A Stranger In My Own Land – Part II

Hi gang,

(When we last left our travel Hero, he was happily blogging from a Seattle pier, looking out at the bay and enjoying himself.   Did he make it home? Let’s rejoin him….)

“Waiter, I’d like a tequila sunrise please.”

“Sure thing – can I see your ID ?”

Blank stare.

“You see, what happened was….”  I told the poor bartender the entire story.  He got a good chuckle out of it,  and handed the drink over.

I downed that and headed for a cab.   I asked him to take me to the Marriott by the airport.

(Queue up the Benny Hill music here)

The Marriott was completely full, I found out just after the cab left.  I hailed another cab and headed for the Holiday Inn.    Full.    Cab number 3 was the winner as we landed at the Hilton.

The Hilton was completely full as well.  However, they did have a room called a Parlor room available, for really cheap.

“What’s so different about it?”  I asked.

“Oh, it’s a little different,”  the receptionist answered.

What choice did I have?  I booked the room and headed upstairs.

A Parlor room, I quickly found out,  was a full sized room, but from the looks of it was made for having business meetings.  As such, the entire room was filled with couches and chairs.  I spotted my bed over in the corner.  Only my bed wasn’t horizontal.  It was a rollout bed, standing on end.

Perfect.

So I spent a very unrestful night on my tiny bed, unconsiously afraid that I would miss the alarm and miss another flight.  I woke up at 4:45 am for my 7:00 am flight, washed my face, put my clothes back on from yesterday, scrubbed my teeth with my finger, and headed out.

This time, when I approached security,  I actually looked like a terrorist.  My clothes were dissheveled, my hair was all messed up – I looked like a homeless guy.   I quickly told Security Guy 1 my spiel, pulled out my wallet, credit cards, family pictures, and Starbucks card, and wait for him to call the supervisor to “make the phone call”

Except, this time,  that didn’t happen.   He wrote SSSS on my boarding pass and said, “go ahead”.

Blank stare.

“Go ahead?”, I say cautiously.

“Yeah, over there”.

And so, I walked right through security.  I got the full strip/cavity search treatment again, but that was it.  I told the guy with his wand in my crotch that yesterday some guy made me stand there for 45 minutes while he called D.C.

“Really?” he answered, “I’ve never heard of that”.

Blank stare.

So here I sit in Atlanta, waiting for my connecting flight to Charlotte.  They just announced that they have oversold the Charlotte flight by 5 seats, and they are offering 2 round trip tickets PER seat.  I IM’ed my wife to say that I was going to rent a car and just drive the rest of the way Net 2 round trip tickets.

“Um, how are you going to rent the car?” was the IM response.

Blank stare.

 

Kevin

[email protected]

https://inflatablemadnessdvd.com

https://buybackmadness.com

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