I watch the cooking channels. I`ve even helped my wife cook. I`ve even cooked a couple of things in my lifetime (though I`m learning not to cut myself and to wear a shirt when frying stuff).
Tonight was a total disaster!!
My wife calls me to ask me to start the hamburger steaks. Basically that`s a large hamburger cooked and served. She tells me what temperature to put it on, how to do it, and even what to do.
I patted the hamburger steaks out into large patties. I placed the large skillet on the burner and turned the burner on. I even salted and used the twisty pepper thing to season it. Then I put the burger in.
Smoke starts billowing out everywhere. I`m yelling to Harry (the African Gray Parrot) to get to low ground, he`s yelling "Harry`s a good boy!!" and the smoke detectors are going off. I grab the cookie sheet or baking sheet or whatever you call that doggone low flat pan you cook biscuits on and open the front door trying to wave some of the smoke out. I`ve got the hood fan going full blast and can`t get the kitchen window open.
Mind you I don`t walk too good in the first place cause I`m on a cane so this was FREAKING ME OUT!!!!
I finally turned the burner waaaaaaaaaaaaay down. The burger stops smoking so much. I now have Blackened Hamburger Steaks. I had to go sit down and smoke a cigarette. Boy. What a night so far.
I called my wife to ask her if she was anywhere near a store. Then I had to tell her that we may just be having broccoli tonight. I didn`t cook that so don`t worry.
I can cook a mean MRE (Meal-Ready-To-Eat). That`s a military meal in the pouch. Course all you need is the flameless burner or body heat for that one.
If you`ve got any helpful hints for a not so experienced cook I`d sure appreciate it.