Hi Chrystal, welcome to Startup Nation (SuN) 
One minor thing
that bugged me, not many people use a "splash page" for this reason, is
that when I clicked your link and arrived, I had to actually click on
the "enter" word. I initially clicked on the Flash logo, assuming ANY
click anywhere would bypass the splash page. I have no interest in
those, nor does anyone else, from the growing statistical referencce.
(Ouch! When I clicked on the Home button, it took me to the splash
page!! That`s no good...it should take me to the first actual page of
real content!)
Anyway, setting
aside that the initial splash didn`t do anything to incite me to click,
I did eventually click "Enter." I expected to see a rapid-fire,
bulleted or otherwise highlighted set of reasons to use this site.
Instead, I thought I was on the "About Us" page. ;-) Anything that
starts with "Our company was started for the purpose of...." should
move to that biographical or résumé page. Not the home page.
The "Features"
subheading should instead be moved up to the headliner...the opening
act, so to speak. The problem is what are the features?
- Personal Strategies
- Academic Strategies
- Financial Strategies
What exactly is a personal "strategy?" As Cookiemonster is wont to say,
"Where can I buy a strategy? How much does it cost, and are there any
other models available?" :-)
I would do
something about a tagline...a slogan or something. For now, you
definitely need to put on that first content page---the "Main"
page---that you are a "private admission consultant."
I don`t know what that means, so you should define it. For example, on the lead of the main page you could have something like:
College Strategies LLC offers private
admissions consulting for people who want a higher education. An
admission consultant helps the student and their family feel confident
someone is working with their best interest in mind during the college
search and selection process.
We help you to maximize academic and financial opportunities by
developing what we call personal, academic and financial strategies
that will create a positive and fulfilling college experience.
This isn`t great, but it`s off the top of my head, borrowing from your
FAQ page. Remember, that a FAQ is "Frequently Asked Questions."
However, it shouldn`t be fundamental questions regarding the nature of
your business!
A FAQ should cover problematic issues that have cropped up from a large
base of end-users, customers, clients, and so forth. It should be the
"catch-all" for technical support questions that OVER TIME have
surfaced as repeating issues.
To use a FAQ to describe the basic nature of the business means you`ve
failed to attract your customers in the first place....see? You would
never include "Where are we located?" in a FAQ. If that many people
were asking, it`s because you`ve failed to tell people how to get to
your store.
Go through your FAQ and take the key questions, then turn them into
real content that actually describes what you do, how you do it, for
whom you do it, and why they should hire you.
There`s a growing idea here, lately, promoted by Cookiemonster and
those of us who agree, that you should focus on what it is you *offer,*
not what it is you *do.* Your site spends all its time explaining what
you do. Fine, but what will that do for ME?
One exercise I`m finding works well is to ask in your mind, while
you`re writing content, "Give me your [something]...and I`ll give you
[something.]"
Apply that to your site. What are you asking me (the visitor) to give you? What will you give me back when I give it to you?
At the moment, you`re saying "Give me the fact that you`re in school
somewhere and I`ll give you back some kind of strategy." Does that even
make sense? No, I don`t think so. But if you were to say, "Give me your
high school diploma, and I`ll get you a college that matches your
dreams," then you`re actually saying something. :-)
CraigL2007-1-28 19:31:15
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