Forums: Discussions for entrepreneurs and small business.

My conundrum is this - I`m slowly running out of money. I have to buy the books in advance and in some cases (Walmart) wait months for payment. The income isn`t enough to do any factoring, and my credit is so poor I wouldn`t be able to get a loan. I have three more books that are coming up that may end up doing really well. I know if I just rented a car and drove from store to store, I`d sell a heck of a lot. Many authors started that way and a few have made millions with that type of sales push. So I know it`s doable.

But I`m pretty worn out and miss making lots of money doing what I used to do. I`m also middle-aged and looking at my bank balance I realize I`m way behind many people I know my age who worked their lives at a good government job or other job and have a nice retirement. I`ve been a constant contractor and have little to show for my life monetarily. (I don`t owe anyone, but if I don`t start turning a corner, I`ll be broke.)

I know I haven`t made a 100% effort. More like 60%. (I could do lots more in the sales department.) I know I`ve also made some decisions based on short-term, not long-term goals and published books that were clear loosers or hooked up with authors/artists that were more time-consuming than money-making.

Great post.

1. How hungry are you for success?

2. How hungry are you for security?

Great questions. Two I hadn`t really even thought about, to be honest. I was so entrenched in the day to day things. I think I`m afraid of success.

Here`s another approach, as I can`t tell you how you evaluate your risks in your conundrum. But reading your post, I got the impression that part of what`s wearing you down is your comparison with "all those other folks" our age who are sittin` pretty. They`ve worked all their lives, accumulated property, a portfolio, a retirement fund, IRAs, securities, and they`re just kickin` back waiting to retire.

Is that really true?

Not so long ago I was working a regular job, making enough to have a decent life. I was bored mindless, but didn`t know it. Then I fell into an opportunity to write a book and make a lot of money from it. "Ah Hah!," I said to myself. "I`ll be a professional writer!"

Not too long after, my life went into the tanks. I have no credit, no money, I`m barely afloat, and pretty tired to boot. For awhile, I also looked at all my peers, contemplating how "lucky" they were not to have a driving passion---a daemon, so to speak.

They had a house, bank account, money, time, barbeques, a working car. I thought maybe how foolish was I, that I had nothing approaching middle age.

Then I got to looking at the time so many of those folks spend traveling for business. I looked at how quickly jobs disappear through outsourcing and downsizing. I watched whole retirement funds vanish at the stroke of a pen, when a corporation got into financial trouble.

I met lots of people online, in chat rooms, IRC channels, forums, and the like. The never-ending refrain seemed to be how lucky *I* am! I`m doing what I want, I have a passion, nobody tells me what to do, I make my own decisions!

:-D The bottom line is that the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence. Don`t let yourself get too dragged down in a false competition. One of my favorite bumper-stickers is, "He who dies with the most toys, wins!"

Is that true? What about the old Socrates line that an unexamined life isn`t worth living? Does passion, creative energy, and personal satisfaction count? If it does, and you`re feeling despair, can`t come up with any new ideas, and aren`t at all satisfied with what you`re doing, does that mean you lose? Have you failed?

Read the biographies of just about any successful person and you`ll see the recurring thread. It`s the old quest myth, where there comes that slough of despond----utter despair. Nothing is working, nothing`s going right, you`re being used and abused, and all you want is to lie down in a hole and sleep.

The trick is to persist. How you do that is up to your, but I can say this: We choose from only two fundamental perspectives of life. Either life is random, or it`s organized. It`s a binary choice---either/or. You can`t have it both ways, and you either intentionally choose to believe one or the other, or you live by accident.

If life is random, then nothing is true. Gravity is luck, the moon and sun accidentally show up each day, and the ocean could just as well turn into cement. But if life is organized, and it doesn`t matter how or by what, then there`s a plot. :-)

And although we may not ever know the plot or who`s the author, we can hope that whatever it is knows what`s going on.

Where there`s hope, there`s life.

Another thing here is to really identify both your true product, and your niche. We originally thought we were selling signal flags. Then we thought we were selling banners, then messages. But when all is said and done, it comes down to our selling "secret" messages---in a colorful, but historical manner.

After we`d figured out what we really are selling---and notice it`s not flags---we then began studying our Google analytics to see what are people searching for. We spent time working out the SEO writing on the Web site, and promoting our site through whatever freebie systems we could find.

Kathy`s great at that stuff, and found Squidoo, the local Merchant`s Circle, and of course SuN. Lindalouwho, you should at least have a profile and web site on your profile. That gets crawled all the time, along with your signature.

Point is that you can promote yourself more online, to supplement the smaller market you`re in. If it doesn`t matter all that much where you live, then Winston`s ideas are excellent. On the other hand, if you really want to stay where you are, then get going more witht the e-commerce thing. Marketing, y`know...? :-)

There`s a really interesting phrase floating around: "The definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results." But there`s a philosophic problem with the idea, just as there usually is in cliches and platitudes.

The problem rests on the fundamental structure of objective truth, objective values, and reality. For example, let`s suppose that you`re a prisoner back in World War II in a concentration camp.

If you follow the above phrase, then if you continue to try to escape, fail, but expect that the next time will be different, you`re insane. So let`s get a bit more granular---another thing platitudes routinely fail to accomplish.

What do we mean when we say do the "same" thing repeatedly? Do we mean the concept of attempting to escape, or do we mean digging exactly the same tunnel, in exactly the same place, with exactly the same process?

Now consider another example. Suppose everyone around you, everywhere you go, believes that the optimal way to live is to use government programs. But you`ve decided that being self-sufficient and self-reliant are a better way to go. Further suppose that in order to pay for those programs, the government is taking more and more money from people like you.

Not only are you losing more and more money, but there`s intense pressure from the consensus to stop and "go with the flow." You continue to do the same thing, trying to start a business, and continue to fail. Does that mean you`re insane? Is there NO objective value to the principles of self-sufficiency?

It comes down to having a clear vision of your values, your ideals, and the kind of life you want to live. It means to know how to explain to yourself and others why you`re repeatedly doing something that "appears to be" failing. And it`s one of the most difficult and dramatic pathways people can choose in life.