Forums: Discussions for entrepreneurs and small business.

K.A.N.Y.C. Enterprises

P.O. Box 904 Peck Slip Station

New York, NY  10272-0904

212 769 7912

kanycwholesale@yahoo.com

www.kanycwholesale.com

 

Dear Madame or Sir,

 

 

K.A.N.Y.C. Enterprises was formed in June 2008 with the intention of being an umbrella for Wholesale/Retail and other ventures. The goal and commitment is to provide consumers with a fine range of products.

 

 

K.A.N.Y.C. has recently launched its’ wholesale division, which carries bath and body, as well as aromatherapy products. You will find the Classic Creations, completely natural line of hair dyes, anti-aging and anti-acne products.  Also, we carry the Artiscent line of salts, lotions and soaps, as well as the Sai and Nag Champa lines of soaps. In addition, we have aromatherapy products, such as spray colognes, aromatic oil set and incense.  In addition, we have home fragrances as well.

 

What are the benefits of buying from K.A.N.Y.C.:

 

Ø     Products are made with natural ingredients and oils

Ø     Price

Ø     Low Minimums 60 per product

Ø     Various payment methods from check to moneygram

 

K.A.N.Y.C. strives to provide the best products and service.  We look forward to making you part of the K.A.N.Y.C. family.

 

 

Thank you. We look forward to hearing from you.

 

 

Sincerely,

 

 

 

Katherine Appello

President/CEO

 

 

Number 1 - Never send something Dear Madame or Sir.  Find out who does the buying for each company you want to sell to and put their name in the letter. 

Number 2 - Your opening paragraph doesn`t address my needs, only yours.

A contact letter like you are sending out, should target specific customers.  Your letter reminds me of people who send the same resume` to different types of companies.  A resume`, like a contact letter should be specific to the company you are sending it to.



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The older we get, the more excuses we make for not chasing after our dreams. But truth is, goals are attainable at any age.

I recommend backing up at least one step and writing down why you are writing this letter.  Who do you want to read it?  What do you want them to do after reading it?  Why should they read it?  Why are you better than what they`re currently doing?  etc.

It looks like you jumped right into the letter without thinking all the way through what you actually want.

BTW, I can`t get your Web site to come up.

This is just an introduction letter, to which a business card will be attached with the website (the domain may not have gone through yet) to let them know what products we offer.  Any suggestions where I can find a template to follow would be appreciated

Make the "WIIFM" portion very clear (what`s in it for me) - go beyond the straight `benefits` to the competitive advantage these features would give a vendor.

Beanie Baby

It`s way to impersonal as well. There is a "tone" that just doesn`t sit right with me... Maybe it`s the fact that you are trying to incorporate a "sales sheet" along with an introductory letter.

 In your line of work, you really need to send a pretty slick brochure which outlines your offerings and the benefits to your prospect. This letter, addressed to the specific buyer should be appealing enough for them to look further into your product line.

I re-worked it and focused on the product line.  I will be finding out the names of the managers to address it to specific individuals.

Bleah.  Go read some books on copywriting, business