Find us elsewhere
Join Now Member Login

Okay - I think I have on my thicker skin

 
New Topic
Post Reply
Follow Topic
Page of 1
  • Author
  • Message
 
aither

posts: 266

Sep 18, 2007 2:24 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
Points: 0   Vote
I`m not getting many responses from my website.  I`m sure there`s a very good reason for that and I tend to think it`s the content which I wrote.  The design is new but the color scheme was taken from the original site I designed in Trellix from Verizon.  I`m currently taking a course to help me get a better handle on writing my content, but I`m only a third of the way through the course.

I`m a Virtual Assistant and the objective for my site is to have serious inquiries from small biz owners needing administrative help.

I think my landing page is the right length but the statements need to be more cohesive.  I haven`t played with the rest of the content (except the bio - shortened it) because I`m not sure what to do yet.

Okay - let me have it.  I`m ready for your wisdom, folks.  Thanks tons!

KDM - A Business Support Service Company
nhgnikole

posts: 2660

Sep 18, 2007 5:58 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
Points: 0   Vote
I think that when you ask things in the form of a question, you give the reader the option of saying no.

So how could you take your "questions" (and I put those in quotes because you left out the question marks only to use one really long run on sentence) and make them into statements?

And then switch it up with some benefit talk.

So what do you really provide? All the benefits of having an administrative assistant without having more paperwork to worry about payroll for that extra person!
Think about benefits - I save time. I increase my cash flow to farm out my billing. I can focus on my business and not the little crap.

Also, when you say you are not getting response ... are you getting hits? Are you using analytics to track your users?
aither

posts: 266

Sep 18, 2007 7:14 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
Points: 0   Vote
This site is newly designed (less than two months) and included analytics, but I haven`t seen those yet.  I should have also mentioned that there is about 10% of the site that has yet to be included, i.e., testimonials and a one-minute recording from moi on the home page.

I`ll have to speak with my designer about the analytics - thanks for reminding me about those.

That`s a great point about the option to say no - I`ll look more closely at that and fix it.  Thank you!  Some real, honest-to-goodness, constructive criticism - love it!
CraigL

posts: 9051

Sep 19, 2007 3:29 AM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
Points: 0   Vote
I`m going with first impressions. Mostly, I think that`s the way people arrive at a Web site, excepting those rare instances where they`ve been referred personally or in relation to something. So they look, get a quick first impression, and either get pulled in...or click away.

I like the colors. They`re peaceful, easy on my eyes, and have good contrast. I can read everything.

I don`t like the "A Business Support Service Company." That sounds like ServiceMaster. You`re a VA, and I`d like to see a better description. Something along the lines of "Virtual Assistance & Office Management," maybe.

The big problem, aside from the questions Nikole discussed quite solidly, is the "passive voice." And as Nikole pointed out, be direct. Get specific. Be personal. Build a journey, then "call the customer to action."

Lose the ellipses...it makes you sound tentative or contemplative, not confident, immediate and specific.

You need a Virtual Assistant (VA) if you:
  • Write for your business or for yourself, or you`ve been thinking of updating your company marketing literature,
  • Spend way too much time with administrative tasks,
  • Have been embarrassed because you forgot an order for a client,
  • Don`t have the time to invoice your clients, and so many bills but no time to pay them,
  • Have no time to spend on marketing and generating revenue,
  • Find yourself spending less and less time doing what it is you love.
This is a little tacky (in my opinion):
You need me! You need KDM - A Business Support Service Company!

I prefer to see some objectivity---the editorial "we" in most type of content, but particularly introductory content. It makes the company sound more professional, and you can talk personally in your résumé or bio. So maybe a change toward:
KDM can free up your time, organize your business, and get you back to the business of running your business.

Contact us at: email@domain.com
My Name
Phone number

The layout of the "Services" page is too compacted. There isn`t enough room to quickly see each of the services under each subheading. So you could remove the bullet "table of contents" at the top, use those as subheadings, then put some bullets below each heading for the most important service areas.

I like the rate sheet. Far too many places don`t want to tell you what they charge, under the old psychology of getting someone curious and wanting to ask. That`s fine in a physical store, but not (in my opinion) on the Web. That`s all about speed---tell me now!

The "About Karen" is where you use the "me," and that looks fine. Rather than read about your passion, I`d rather read about your background and experience, though. How long have you been doing this, why do you think you`re a pro, and what are two examples where you saved a client some goodly number of dollars. :-)

Contact Me is find, and can just have your contact info. I see no reason why you shouldn`t also have it on the home page, but that`s personal choice and aesthetics. A contact page is good, useful, and helpful.

You also might want to connect up with Tawnya`s site (community member), and provide it as a link for more information about VAs.

Overall, it`s a nice site. But I think there`s opportunity for SEO writing. To accomplish that, you`re going to need a strong "theme" for branding YOU as different or at least separate from all other VAs.
CraigL2007-9-19 3:31:36
iouone2

posts: 1185

Sep 19, 2007 1:58 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
Points: 0   Vote
Yes. I really agree with both comments given thus far. I really got the impression (from the use of `me` and `call me to see if I can...`) that you are just breaking into this industry. That leads to questions of your qualifications.

One thing a little different from the comments is that I like the simple breakdown of bullet points on the opening page. I do agree they need a little rewriting, but I appreciated the declaration of what a personal assistant can do for me. It immediately tells me if I am on a page of interest.

Last but not least. I really dislike the color choice. The purple seems nice as an accent color. I don`t think the green is a good match. I also think this dark green makes the page seem heavy. My attitude towards feeling invited to read is turned off a bit. When I mouse over the links on the right, it turns to an almost neon green. The whole mouse over = change color, is just too entry level fluff to me. It detracts from your credibility simply because every "new" designer thinks it`s cool and they try to use it. Please don`t miss understand. Who ever designed it may be a great web designer. I am just saying that the rollover image being used is not classy enough for a professional website.

Back to the green background. When the browser window is opened large the green turns into a square which holds the content together. It make my eyes require a sort of tunnel vision to read what`s in the "square". This make the eyes tired. I suggest a lighter outside color, although I don`t have a suggestion for that color choice. Definitely find a better match for the purple accents.

Since your website was designed by Distant Support Virtual Assistance, you will want to be sure to have the most professional looking site in design and functionality. You are showcasing your skills to acquire quality virtual assistance.

I hope this helps.


-------------------------

Vincent Wilcox (a.k.a. KRAKR)
Drummer
My band: Letters Make Words
aither

posts: 266

Sep 19, 2007 2:18 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
Points: 0   Vote
Thanks for the comments so far.  I have to let some of this sink in a bit.

I have a question for you, Craig.  You say , "I like the rate sheet. Far too many places don`t want to tell you what they charge, under the old psychology of getting someone curious and wanting to ask. That`s fine in a physical store, but not (in my opinion) on the Web. That`s all about speed---tell me now!"

I`m not sure if you want to see the rates or not.  Many in the VA industry do not post their rates to avoid price shoppers.  There was also a study done that showed there was less interest when the rates were posted.
iouone2

posts: 1185

Sep 19, 2007 2:48 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
Points: 0   Vote
I think it would be safe to place verbiage about pricing just don`t post specific pricing information. As a buyer of your service, I would like to understand some sort of range in fees. It would be nice to read a quote or see a chart that states and average cost of doing business with you. You might state something like, "In most cases, our fees amount to an average cost of $xx per hour." Or, "Although services vary from client to client, our average billing ranges from $xx to $xx for the following types of services." And then list a package and invite the reader to get a more accurate quote by contacting you and discussing their specific situation.

This would narrow down your target audience. It they think it`s too expensive... that`s fine. If they think it`s a reasonable amount you may get an inquiry about your skills and the cost of addressing the potential client`s situation.


-------------------------

Vincent Wilcox (a.k.a. KRAKR)
Drummer
My band: Letters Make Words
kaa1

posts: 20

Sep 19, 2007 3:30 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
Points: 0   Vote

Hi

I agree with the comments above with regards to your template colour. I think keeping your logo colours is fine (purple and slight green in the logo)  However a lighter colour possibly white like you blog would work better. Other wise unless your zoom in closer it`s hard to read your content.  Possibly change the buttons also. Before choosing a template go to http://www.templatemonster.com/   and have a look at the selection on website template. 

Once landing on your home page, you should possibly have simple elements on the home page detailing what your selling before explaining what VA is. It would be nice to know straight away what you offer rather then having to click on another link to get to the services page.  The trouble with the web is that if people have to think too much they will go else-where.   Just remember Keep it simple but relevent. 



-------------------------

http://www.webpreneuronline.com/
Your start-up guide to online business and income strategies!


CraigL

posts: 9051

Sep 19, 2007 4:25 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
Points: 0   Vote
Re: rate sheets,

I suppose this is like the argument over sales letters versus articles, or long v. short landing pages. I think a whole lot of people on the Web ARE price shopping! They want to know, right away, can they afford this and is it a decent price.

Sure there are people who want to compare prices, but so what? That`s where the sales pitch comes in. As for me, I really get annoyed when I spend time looking at a product, decide it`s something I`d like, then go through the rigamarole to buy it, then find out the price is too high or not appropriate.

Mostly nowadays, if I can`t find out the price quickly, I click away. That applies to services or hard goods. Maybe it`s just me and I`m in a minority...but that`s where my comments are coming from.
aither

posts: 266

Sep 19, 2007 5:26 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
Points: 0   Vote
I have to agree with your reasoning, Craig.  I`ve gone back and forth about this - and I`m still not sure what I`ll do. 

Everyone has given me lots to think about - some of it`s my work, some my designer`s.
Page of 1
Post Reply
 
.
Advertisement

Keep the Community Clean!

  • StartupNation forums should be used as a platform to learn, educate others, share stories, tips & tricks and to provide constructive feedback.
  • Please do not use the Forums for advertising & blatant self-promotion.
  • Please be respectful to other members and refrain from personal attacks and vulgar language.
  • StartupNation reserves the right to delete any message, reply, and/or member who violates our terms of use.
Read full terms of use
Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement