Forums: Discussions for entrepreneurs and small business.

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Hi Colin :-)
I looked at the site, and it starts out looking pretty clean and simple to follow. However; there are a few elements that also begin to grow increasingly distracting. As I cruised the site, they became more annoying.

The first is the use of horizontal "scan lines" in some of your basic images. For instance, on the landing page you have these lines in both your banner text and the picture of the guy (you?) sitting at the table.

I`m supposing this is meant to invoke images of a video screen. But there`s the deal: If you actually saw those lines on a video screen, you`d immediately call a repair person or junk the monitor. So too, as I viewed the rest of the site, there was a vague feeling that began to grow that "this site is broken." So I`d remove the lines.

On the left, your menu buttons are very low contrast with the white text on green background. That`s difficult to read for a lot of people, myself included, and so the "Annoy-O-Meter" began to creep upwards.

In the writing, you have a repeating problem of redundancy. :-) I didn`t intend to make a point of it, but I first saw the problem in this sentence:
Redundant, in its formal sense, means to repeat something unecessarily. It also means to say the same thing twice in a sentence, with that sameness usually referring to meaning, but also being to repeat an actual word.

• Welcome to the Department of Redundancy department
• I recently started working on a company that`s starting to work.

You have the word "Welcome" twice at the start of the landing page, neither of which is necessary. We already know we`re on the landing page, and we assume we`re welcome there.

The navigation and tabs should tell me what I`ll find on this site. I don`t need you to tell me what I already know. "As of now" indicates you`re not sure what you`re doing, and "with plans to" doesn`t help me right now. I don`t need you to tell me that there`s a handy set of tabs to the left, since it`s self-evident.

See, the problem is a global "stye" issue, where it comes to writing. I don`t usually include grammar lessons in a critique :-) but you did wonder about the writing and content. Since this is a "repeating" problem (ironically), I thought I`d mention it. You could use an editor, I think.

This first sentence is also "passive" voice. You can change it to a more forceful, active sentence:

"To the mainstream" is redundant because "affordable" already assumes the mainstream.

The following heading, "Why Pick DV-Design`s Site?" has two problems. First, you don`t use a company name as a possesive in this context. That makes the sentence seem to mean that "DV-Design" is a person`s name, and you`re choosing his or her site. Instead, the heading should be "Why choose DV-Design?"

More importantly, the heading should go above the paragraph that provides your main feature of affordable video editing.

I began clicking around, seeing the various process steps, then I wanted to go "Home." I clicked the button and nothing happened. I looked closely, and saw that only the word "home" is a link. The button itself is nothing but a graphic. Change it so that the button is part of the link.

Additionally, make your logo or banner a link back to the home page, just as a convenience feature.

All in all, the site is okay, but not very persuasive. I don`t think you need as much content as you do, particularly since your company provides a visual product. Think about it this way: In one sentence, what`s the most important reason why anyone would use digitial video editing?

The Web site should state that sentence on the landing page, then spend the bulk of the real estate showing examples of that solution. If I want to read an article about the benefits of video editing, I`ll go look one up in Wikipedia or on About.com. But at this point, presumably, I`m looking for someone to actually do this editing for me.

I`d like to see some before-after examples, as embedded video on the site. There should be a voice-over that offers discussion of what was wrong with the original, why it was changed in a particular way (being demonstrated), and how it made the video better. And how the customer was satisfied with the changes.

Your current images break up the monotony of the text, but they really have little bearing on the site itself, other than they`re images of video "stuff."

"About Us" isn`t about you. It`s about video editing. That`s an article, and should either be titled as such in the tab, or moved to a different location on the site.

So: The site is okay, but it demonstrates that you`re a production person, not a sales person. That`s fine; there are lots of famous examples of the difference. The two Steves who created Apple computers come to mind. I`d suggest you do what you do best, and delegate the rest. :-) Hire a Web site editor, and make sure they have a professional relationship with a graphic and layout specialist.

Remember, you asked for it.....

I just looked at the home page in detail, but there are spelling and grammatical errors on every page of the site.

Home Page:

and turn it into a master piece.
"Masterpiece" is one word

for Video or Slideshow(no need
Put a space before the "("
Personally, I wouldn`t use parenthesis here.  Just turn your bullet points into complete sentences.  Speaking of bullet points, -DV-Design is confusing.

, and making sure that your happy. 
"Your" should be "you are" or "you`re".

In many case`s we charge as little as ¼ of what other sites charge.
"Cases" is the plural of "Case".  Case`s is the possessive of case.
Spell out the "one-quarter" because you don`t know what fonts and what browser the viewer is using.
It`s also an awkward sentence.  I would re-do it altogether as:
"In many cases our prices are one-quarter of those charged by other sites."

turning their video`s into wonderfully
video`s is not the plural of video.  It should be videos.

The difference in cost, without sacraficeing quality!
Spelling: sacrificing

we do not sacrifice quality to accomplish this. Your video will come out without sacrificing the quality of the video or sound. The sound will remain synced to the video.
How many times do you want to say the same thing: Sacrifice?  The last sentence is completely unnecessary.

I did watch the video on the home page, and I saw someone with a deer-in-the-headlights look with a Ben Stein monotone.  GET EXCITED about your product.  If you aren`t excited, then how do you expect your viewers to get excited?  Also, you`re selling editing, so show us some.

As I said, there are similar errors on every page where I looked.



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Steve Mann
Internet Videographer
MannMade Digital Video
My Email

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Video Editing Help
Photo Editing Help
Auto A/C Compressors

Remember that a spell chequer can writely make sure yore spelling all is right, but that don`t make it sew.

If your website is the sole medium through which you will be reaching out to potential customers, I highly recommend hiring a professional web designer to launch a presentable website for you.  Doing it yourself will cost you more in lost business than just paying someone to do it right from the start.  I have done many redesigns for small businesses on a low budget with great success.  Adding a cart system to your site is not that expensive either and will help retain business (rather than sending customers to paypal or google).

Let me know if I can help,