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How did you overcome shyness?

 
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Innoword

posts: 5

Jan 17, 2008 10:28 AM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
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Jobs.

I have always been an extremely shy person and speaking in public terrifies me like nothing else. However, when I needed some extra cash I remembered something I read in Rich Dad, Poor Dad about taking jobs you`re not so great at to improve your skills. That helped me to get up the courage to teach English as a Second Language part-time to Spanish businessmen for six months.

I remember being scared out of my wits every day, yet guess what? I`m still terribly shy, but now I can walk into a room and talk to anyone. I may feel like a complete idiot doing it, but the important thing is that now I can.

What did I do? Before every class I would give myself a mental pep talk ("I can do this!") and practice breathing exercises in the ladies restroom. Like LisaPR, the acting angle helped me as well. Every day I would tell myself that I was just acting, and today I would play the part of the cool, confident, professional businesswoman. The first few days of class I just wanted to jump out the window, but as the months passed, it got easier and easier and I can definitely say that my social and business skills are stronger for it.
Innoword1/18/2008 8:55 PM
CraigL

posts: 9051

Jan 17, 2008 6:16 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
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That really does seem to be the best way---the acting thing. Over and over, throughout my own years of being an entertainer, I`ve heard the same thing. "Act as if...." and as time passes, the act becomes real.

The key, though, is that while you`re working to overcome the shyness, you`re "just pretending" to be confident. It`s a mental perspective trick, but it definitely seems to work for a lot of people! :-)

RosannaTussey

posts: 63

Feb 11, 2008 6:29 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
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For me, nothing overcomes shyness better than having a purpose and something of value to relate.  Making small talk with people I do not know is not my stongpoint (but I still try).  However, I find that if I have something to share that will most likely be worthwhile to whomever I am speaking with or to, I don`t feel shy at all.  I actually enjoy speaking then (yes, even public speaking).

-------------------------

Rosanna Tussey
Owner
New Mexico Candle Co.
http://www.nmcandleco.com
Feb 11, 2008 8:43 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
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Not only was I a shy child, but I developed an anxiety disorder in my late teens. Since my first sales job I`ve been successful. Aside from my slightly anti-social tendencies, to my friends I appear outgoing and vivacious. Editors love me, bosses love me, I ace interviews and speak effectively to large groups.

How did I do it? I have a personality that I `wear` when I need to be on. I put on the "customer service" mask.



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Robin Noelle
Professional Marketing & Public Relations
www.robin-noelle.com
CraigL

posts: 9051

Feb 11, 2008 9:54 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
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So, sort of acting, right Robin? I know that`s how I initially got over stage-fright, by making up a personality. But over time, I sort of got to liking that personality, so I kept it...and it just melded into who I am. :-)
Feb 12, 2008 4:06 PM ET    Quote  Report Abuse
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Yes, but without joining a group or theater company. It is faking it until you  make it though!


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Robin Noelle
Professional Marketing & Public Relations
www.robin-noelle.com
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