Hi Cynthia :-) Welcome to Startup Nation (SuN). Don`t worry so much
about if you did something right or not---this is pretty much a
free-flowing lounge where entrepreneurs and people who want to start
their own business talk about everything that`s involved.
I went to your site, and it looks nice in general. The problem I see
has more to do with the content---the copywriting, or written text. For
example, here`s your lead-in text:
Welcome to Streamside Farm!
Barbie™ Dolls live in plastic houses. Webkins™; in a virtual world. Breyer™ Horses, however, command historic real estate.
Stunning, lifelike, pieces of history. Streamside Farm™ has created one of a kind toy barns for kids who LOVE their Breyer™ horses. Each barn is individually hand crafted from wood gathered from historic barns around Michigan. Some of these barns were close to 150 years old, offering...
I`ve bolded the "shutter-click" of the content to show you how I see
it. I`m a proofreader, freelance editor, and writer, so I`m making my
argument based on reading an awful lot of stuff. :-D
What I`m seeing, and hopefully trying to highlight, is that you have
way too many Trademark symbols, you`re talking about everyone OTHER
than yourself, and you have a mixed message---something about horses,
wood, barns, and toys.
To solve the trademark issue, put a disclaimer down at the bottom of
the page that says something to the effect that all brand names,
including (list) are trademarked by their owners. You can look up the
actual text on the Web.
But to solve the mixed message problem involves some thoughtful
analysis and introspection. In your above post, you`ve given me a clear
and easily visualized explanation of your site. I knew "all about it,"
even before I clicked the site. Then when I got there, nothing of what
you`d said comes across.
Why not pretty much copy and paste what you put into your introduction here, right into the lead-in content of the home page?
Instead of "Welcome to Streamside Farm," (I`m there already, assume I`m
welcome), consider putting a quick sales pitch into a headline. It
could be something like, "Historic Barns---Own a Little Piece of History
The heading should provoke a raised eyebrow, introduce a little
mystery, and attract the reader to perhaps read "just a little bit
more" to find out how these barns are a) historic, and b) can be owned
I`d like to click the large image on the front page, which is
excellent, and go to the main "Barns" page. That`s your products page,
and lots of people sort of expect a picture to be a link, these days.
It would introduce an "activity" for the visitor---something for them
to do, instead of just sitting passively.
In the same way, instead of bolding the words "Gambrel" and "Monitor,"
in the content itself, turn those into links and put the viewer onto a
page that explains and has pictures of that particular model.
All in all, it`s a nice site, but it isn`t focused on selling either
the barns or the "historic wood" novelty. I think that can be brought
out a lot better, and it`s not about technology; it`s about sales,
writing, excitement, and toys. Toys are Fun, right? :-)