Okay, Kathy and I talked about this vacation thingie everyone`s discussing. We like Jeff`s idea of being away from the phones and outside, but we also like the idea of still being able to work. So we figured, hey, let`s try it. Let`s take a Vacation and go Fishing!!
It was great! The doctor said they`d let us go home, probably tomorrow, but that`s okay. Never ones to complain, we turned that frown upside down, made lemons out of lemonade...or what...EH...ver...and we`re pretending we`re still at the hotel.
As you guys know, we make signal flags, so the first thing was we couldn`t go too far from home. The longest extension cord we could find for the sewing machine was only about 100 feet, but we bought three of them. There`s this great pond across the street, near the new bank, and with two more extensions we could just get the machine there by the pond.
We hauled along a small card table, the fabric, rulers, pencils, and whatnot, all the accoutrements of signal-flag makings. I`d thought of duct-taping down the cords, since they DO cross the road, after all, but figured it wouldn`t matter. So we went back and got the rods and fishing poles.
It was sunny, and Kathy figured she`d toss in a worm and bottom fish. I wanted to use lures, thinking we might catch a big bass. She baited the hook, tossed the line, then went back to work on flags. I came up with a great idea, and wrapped the line around the bobbin part of the machine, so if she caught a fish, she`d know. (I didn`t want to bother her while she was sewing to shout and holler about the fish!)
Meanwhile, I set up the lure, and did some casting about. Okay, so maybe if I`d had my glasses on, I would`ve seen the hook was close to the sewing machine, but hey...this was supposed to be a Vacation! I didn`t have work on my mind!
It`s not so much that the lure hooked the machine, it`s that when I cast it sort of like jerked the card table a bit. Okay, a lot, but hey...I swear I didn`t think the machine would sink THAT fast!
Kathy got all excited, hootin` and hollerin`, and with the weight of the machine, I thought she`d caught a fish! I just didn`t HAPPEN to notice, okay? I mean...I was excited! Who knew it was the sewing machine? Anyway, since the cops want a statement in the next day or so, I figure this helps me get our stories straight.
Anyway...that wasn`t all that bad, it was more the electricity that got out of hand. When the machine went in the pond, it seems the power was still going. Now, I know you guys warn and warn and warn about electricity and water, and really, we`re not, like...kids, right? But in all the excitement, okay...so I forgot, okay? There...go ahead, blame me.
It`s not like I need hair, all that much, and the plastic surgeon said that the skin will heal. It`s just that I won`t have hair in those places. At least Kathy can wear a wig, and who`ll notice? The other guy was okay, it`s only that his car probably was insured. (I hope.)
So there`s Kathy, waving at all the passersby from the pond, and I`m tryin` to undo the extension cords, getting sort of electrocuted in the process, so I had things on my mind. I was backing up, trying to find my lure, `cause it`s expensive, and I didn`t even SEE the car!
Fortunately, he was driving defensively, so with just a small change in itinerary, he went to help Kathy. I guess he could see she was mad about being wet, `cause he drove into the pond to help. That`s about when the power went out. I`m not sure, but from what they said on the news, it was most of the western Chicago suburbs, but as I said, I can`t swear to that.
When the fire department showed up, they wanted to know what was going on. I was a bit on fire, but I tried to explain we were taking a vacation. It`s just that my teeth were glued together, so it sounded weird. And you know how embarrassing it is when you can`t talk right. They doused the flames---well, it mostly was smoke---but they did their thing, and the tow truck showed up.
Oh, the nurse just came back, and said I`m not supposed to be logged into personal stuff from the nurse`s station, so I`ll finish up quick. Turns out we`re not supposed to be fishing in the pond, but without my glasses, I didn`t see the No Trespassing sign. And Kathy was busy sewing, and keeping an eye on the bobber, so we just didn`t notice, okay?
They`ve got most of the power back on, although someone said something about blowing out a switching station, I dunno. All in all, I`m not so sure this Vacation idea is a good one, though. We didn`t get ANY flags done, and now we have to borrow a new sewing machine. I mean, sure, you spend money on a vacation, but we really didn`t go all THAT far from home, right?